This summer, I was spoiled by one of my favorite family in the world, the Stoloff family.
It started when Dawn, one of the 4 amazing Stoloff’s sisters made me ’official priest/rabbi’ of her wedding ceremony with Pierre in Cantal in June.
The wedding took place in the charming village of Chalinargues. It was 12 degres C° and I thought I was going to be hospitalized for severe rhinitis.
I had never officiated a wedding before but like any performance, I thought one can do anything with dedication and preparation. Inspired by Pierre and Dawn’s long-lasting love relationship, I had great fun doing it.
Even though I stood in front of a huge cow’s painting under the beautiful canapy, I believe the outfit made me credible for the role: the long Indian shawl, the white mao shirt, the haircut, the simplicity. I wanted to look like an approachable buddhist priest. At the end of the ceremony someone came up to me and asked ‘So, you are a female buddhist priest?’
I fell in love with the cows in Cantal, they are the most beautiful in France. PERIOD.
Being fed to Cantal and Saint Nectaire cheese for a few days will send any humans on cloud nine.
A month prior to the wedding, we rehearsed the ceremony over the phone and emails and the morning before the afternoon of the wedding. We did not improvised it all, we knew the different parts of the ceremony, roles, timing and speech order. The rest was unknown and we were going to ‘live up to the moment and go with it’.
I was a bit stressed because of an irrational fear of not being able to ‘manage’ the unknown. I had a skin flare-up before the ceremony and panicked. I reached for 2 glasses of red wine and Cantal cheese. It stopped. Natural medecine, baby.
Pierre’s poem made us all teary-eyed as did the sisters’ poem ’parceque c’est NOUS’ and Sacha’s reading, particularly poignant. I want to send a big special thanks to Gérard Farenc without which ‘parceque NOUS sommes’ would still be a mystery to us. Monsieur Farenc was my philosophy teacher at Lycée Lacroix Narbonne, a role model and an inspiration. Unlike many high school professors, he had the right balance of authority and friendliness with his students. He would play guitar during lunch break and tell us about jazz. And he was on facebook! I instantly reached out to him for poem suggestions. I shared a brief description of the couple I was going to marry and a day later, Monsieur Farenc sent me “Parce que NOUS sommes” from Rosalind Brackenbury. Dawn LOVED it. The sisters LOVED it. (see the poem in full french at the end of the post. Anyone motivated to translate into english?)
As it was a long poem, we divided it up so that each sisters would read 2 paragraphs in rotation.
I’m honored and proud to have officiated my first wedding for 2 marvelous friends, uber cool people and down-to-earth souls, Dawn and Pierre.
Mazel Tov my friends, que la vie vous lèche d’amour comme il le faut.
Think of something I can do that I do not know I can do and I’ll do it tomorrow.
And anyone getting married this week-end? Call me. I would love to serve you and officiate again.
Parce que nous sommes.
c’est d’une romancière Rosalind Brackenbury, peu traduite en français, et connue surtout pour sa nouvelle “Becoming George Sand”. Le poème s’appelle ”Parce que NOUS sommes” (et c’est le “nous” qui est important…
Voici ce que cela donne :
Parce que nous sommes.
Je suis parce que nous ommes, créatures
aux cinq orteils, aux doigts élégants,
dont l’esprit fleurit comme du corail
et les rêves s’étendent sur la terre avant de s’enfuir.
Je suis parce que nous sommes, animaux
qui adorent se frotter, se lécher, se câliner,
se faire des papouilles, s’embrasser à pleine bouche,
laper le lait qui blanchit le minois de leurs petits
et l’eau scintillante des piscines,
cueillir la sueur qui perle au cou aimé et lisser
leur fourrure d’un coup de langue.
Je suis parce que nous aimons nager, dormir, manger,
nous étendre au soleil et marcher à l’ombre;
parce que nous sommes les poissons
qui sillonnent les eaux claires
ou dansent plus bas, là où l’océan touche
le fond et s’emplit d’obscurité.
Je suis grâce aux siècles de pensée,
aux siècles de rêves, à la poésie,
à l’herbe, à la musique, au maïs qui pousse,
grâce au vin tiré du raisin
et du pain tiré du blé.
Je suis grâce aux millions de mains,
grâce aux peintures rupestres,
à la ligne tracé sans remords,
bison sur les parois,
biche dans la clairière.
Je suis grâce aux étoiles filantes, aux pluies diluviennes,
aux bateaux qui prennent le large, aux empreintes de pas,
graâce aux hommes et aux femmes
qui s’envolent ensemble, qui se couchent
ensemble, et s’envolent, encore et encore;
grâce au père, à la mère, aux frères,
aux amants, aux enfants, à tous ceux qui
font l’amour; grâce aux peaux, aux yeux, aux mains
et aux mots; grâce aux liens qui nous unissent,
au souffle qui m’anime.
Je suis grâce au velours de la nuit,
au chirurgien qui m’a sauvée,
grâce à l’intelligence,
à la vigilance,
grâce à tous ceux
qui se sont aimés
depuis tout ce temps.
Et pour toujours. Je suis. Nous.
Monsieur Farenc me dit ‘Ce poème est une déclaration bouddhiste de “co-dépendance”. Il me semble parfaitement adapté pour des gens qui s’aiment et qui aiment’





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